Body as machine experiment 1: RAW
RAW (body as machine) is an experiment in which I explored the relationship between my body and mind, the concept of presence and connection to space and audience.
The form and concept of this experiment was initally influenced by the RAW ultra endurance bike race.
To be performed 17-21st March 2010, Final performance installation – 21st March NRLA The Arches, Glasgow
THE START
The R.A.W (Race across the West), is an annual ultra endurance timed bike event, commonly referred to as Racing against the clock or The Race of Truth. A race that Spans 860 miles across North America, where soloists ride none stop until they must sleep, sleep for less than 2 hours a day, stay fuelled on liquid carbohydrate strapped to their backs. Many don’t complete it, many end up injured, and many refuse to stop.
I wanted to engage with one single action for an extended period of time. I wanted to attempt something I didn’t know if I would be able to do. I wanted to put my mind and body through a process that tested my perceived limits. I wanted to see how I dealt with difficult moments. I wanted to explore the difference between solitude and loneliness.
I wanted to critique my desire to find my breaking point.
THE JOURNEY
November 2009 – I wrote a 17 week training programme to prepare for this experiment and I documented my journey.
The human body was entering a machinery of power that explores it, breaks it down and rearranges it. A ‘political anatomy’ [...] subjected and practised bodies, ‘docile’ bodies.’ (Foucault)
I became aware of the extent to which I have been conditioned to see the body as an amazing complex system of chemical reactions, which responds and adapts to external stimulus. A machine that can be trained, controlled, manipulated, shaped; that must be broken down in order to be built up. My theoretical ideologies go against this, to quote Ayn Rand’s, I believe in an integrated view of our existence as ‘indivisible entities of matter and consciousness’, not a split mind and body battling for control. This is what I preach, this is what I believe. But if I truly analyse my own behaviour and feelings is this what I experience? is this the ideology that I live by? Do I understand this only in theory?
I began to realise how human I was, things didn’t go as planned. My body didn’t do what I had decided it would, my mind reacted unexpectedly. I felt elated, I felt angry, I felt I understood and was then confused. Things get easier and then harder, there is no clear pattern to my development. Life gets in the way, time gets in the way, and knee pain gets in the way and mostly my mind gets in the way.
This all made me anxious, scared, angry, weak and then something changed, I began to enjoy this unpredictability; My body proving not to be a subjected and practised ‘docile’ body, that obeys and responds; that is not so easily understood.
I question the control which I impose on my body, the way I feel about my ability and inability. Throughout this process I have cycled a static 2500 miles trying to find answers. I discovered I am stronger than I think, that I cant second guess my mind and body, that I deviate.
I documented my thoughts and created a booklet of fragments from this journey. To request a copy email Kate@katestannard.co.uk
IN THE END
Through executing this action what became more important to me was being completely present and connected to my body and environment. To stay balanced on a fine edge of feeling any pain, aches, bodily sensations, increased breath, heart rate, adrenalin without being consumed by it. As soon as pain became too much my mind started finding ways to deal with it that distracted my from the moment, from the people around my from my environment. I went in to my ‘own shell’. I cut off.
By the end of the process this work was no longer about testing my endurance I choose not to ride non-stop, sleep for only an hour, stay fuelled on liquid carbohydrate. I started with this desire but throughout my process questioned it, questioned this whole mindset. I pushed myself to states of exhaustion, I grew sad, isolated, ill, confused. I suffered dehydration, I couldn’t walk up stairs, I cried a lot. So I stopped, I breathed, I changed route.
Within my life I push myself to extremes, in doing so I cut off from other people. RAW (body as machine) became about connection, in which I commitment to a space and a task for an extended period of time. I committed to staying present and staying connected to you and to me.
Throughout the 5 days I formed relationships with people who I may never have met. They brought me food, ballons, flowers; massaged my hands, neck, back; stood close, watched, confessed, questioned.
I watched the space and people transform over the hours, I experienced the other work of the festival through the audiences, stories, anacdotes, and emotions.
With the world in constant motion if I remain still, I wont miss a thing.
Body as machine experiment 1: RAW took place throughout the NRLA 2010, in the Arches Glasgow. Start 17.30 on 17-3-10. End 19.15 on 21-3-10
(NRLA as part of New Territories, produced by New Moves International http://www.newmoves.co.uk/national-review-of-live-art)
For ore information on this project visit, http://rawbodyasmachine.wordpress.com/
